The Golden Lily Adrian's POV
by christina.ly.58
Summary: This story parallels that of the Golden Lily. Everything that happens in this book happened in the Golden Lily, except it's told through Adrian's point of view.
1. Chapter 1

Summary: Wonder what went through Adrian's head in the Golden Lily? Well this story covers how Adrian might have acted behind the scenes because obviously we didn't get enough of Adrian in the Golden Lily.

Disclaimer: Because I am trying to stay true to the novel, anything that actually happened will remain the same, only through Adrian's eyes. Anything behind the scenes, and not shown is written from my imagination on how he might have acted. This series belongs to Richelle Mead, and I take no claim for it.

Why you should read it? For enjoying purposes, and for us to escape to Adrian's head.

**Chapter One**

Last night I was told, through Jill that Sydney was leaving for the alchemist headquarters, and immediately I was upset. Not because she was leaving, but because she didn't have the decency to warn me beforehand. If I knew, if only I knew, I would have bought some more liquor and cigarettes to drown out the constant look of disappointment (or maybe it was irritation) from Belikov and Sonya.

We're supposed to be doing research, but to be quite frank, this is stupid, and we're not getting anywhere close to finding out the reason why reformed Strigoi are immune to becoming one again. Sonya claims that the answer lies in the aura, but I wasn't so sure. Nevertheless, try telling Sonya and Belikov that they are totally heading in the wrong direction…let's just say the result didn't end well.

Actually to their credit, they were able to somewhat place the blame of our failure on me because apparently I have cooperating issues, and half of the time I was drunk on hard liquor. Let me first of all say that no, I was not drunk half of the time; it was ¾ of the time, and I definitely don't have cooperating issues. Rather, I simply can't help seeing Belikov talk to Rose every, probably, six hours. That alone contributes to ¼ of the time of why I'm drunk.

Arguably I should be over Rose by now, but I was in love with her. She was the first person, who I ever really loved, and she broke my heart, so even if I did get over her, I'll kind of dislike her for the rest of my life.

And I have a very long life ahead that is unless I go crazy from Spirit.

Currently Sonya and Belikov are sitting in my kitchen discussing their latest findings, which let me tell you, is not that amazing. Don't get me wrong I understand their drive and urgency. It all goes down to finding the quote on quote cure against creating more Strigoi. But still, I think the research is inconclusive.

While they drone on and on about how their discover I was lying on the couch with my eyes closed imagining myself sitting on a sunny beach (and yes, don't even go there I know I am a vampire, so going to the beach in the morning or afternoon is out of the question) with Rose.

In my imagination, Rose is gorgeous, as she always is. Her dark brown hair was slightly ruffled by the wind, and her hand was holding my face, pulling me closer and closer to her. Leaning in, I placed my lips on hers, but they were cold as they always were. Within seconds she released her hands from me and faded into nothingness, leaving me sitting on the beach alone. As I always am. Silently, I sighed. These days, I don't know whether I love her, or am still mad at her for using me. I suppose it is a little bit of both.

Having Sydney here usually distracts me from memories of Rose, but with her gone I'm stuck here with her boyfriend. The one who obviously loathes me even though I technically help saved his ass. "I'm hoping you're awake," called out a voice from the kitchen. "What?" I answered with a hint of annoyance lacing my tone.

"We were discussing tomorrow's experiment, care to join us? If you're not to intoxicated that is," he added with a smirk. How I wish I can punch the smirk off his face, but than he's a dhamphir, and I'm a moroi so the odds are against me.

I rolled my eyes and got up sitting across from Belikov, "So, what about it?" I asked them.

Sonya turned her head towards me and explained, "Well we were thinking about doing an aura test tomorrow, a different one of course, we were planning on getting Eddie over and doing a series of reaction tests, to see if their aura is different when shown a particular picture." I wanted to roll my eyes, but than this is Sonya, and she didn't steal my girlfriend, so I shrugged my shoulders.

"Do whatever you want, but I just hope you know this is kind of pointless. Whatever we are finding, whatever research we have, none of it explains why he," I said nudging my shoulders to the guy in the duster, and continued, "is more special than everyone else."

Dimitri rolled his eyes and began, "Well, if you have any other inputs, maybe you should call the shots, but usually you're found drinking them."

"Oh, funny, I didn't know you had a funny bone in your body," I said, than suddenly remembered something Jill mentioned the other night. Yes, the same night she broke the news that Sydney was leaving for wherever it is she was going. Jill mentioned that Eddie was going to be out shopping for Angeline.

I contemplated whether or not to tell them, and decided against it. Eddie will call them later. It's usually them who gets informed anyways. If Jill hadn't told me, than I'm pretty sure they would have kept me in the dark. I'm a useless asset to this experiment, and I'm pretty sure Belikov thinks that too. He just doesn't want to say it.

After all, I'm guessing he trusts Rose's assessment of me.

We sat at the table for another hour or so with them discussing and me listening to their banter. After an hour or so Dimitri announced that it was late, and they should return back to Clarence's house for the night.

Retreating to my bedroom I sat on the computer and began typing an email to Sydney. Chuckling I remembered the first time I fired her an email. It was the day Belikov got here, and the same day I swore that I would try to live myself better. Well to myself I said that to myself, to Sydney, I said something different.

The first email went something like…

_Day 1. Thought I could start to forget Rose, but apparently she had other plans. I swear she's behind sending her beloved Russian here to torture me. I have decided after thorough inspection to call him Agent Boring Borsht. When not talking to Sonya (who I will now refer to as Agent Scarlet) about their research they bore me with tedious comments on how I should live my life. Agent Scarlet has used up all of my hair supplies, and left me with a comb full of her red hair. Send in money, help, and maybe new hair supplies._

_-Prisoner 2010_

Hope you guys like the story.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

At that memory of the email, I smiled to myself. Sydney Sage usually does that to me. She somehow makes me smile even when I feel like the world is against me. I swear Sydney thinks of herself as regal, and yet I see someone who is socially awkward, and insecure of herself. Sometimes I find her so torn that I want to glue, or stitch her back up, but than the problem was I didn't know how to sew, nor did I have money for glue.

Than again, maybe I smile because I feel like she is someone I can call a friend. She is the only one who believes that there is more to me than the party boy visage I try so hard to create. Maybe because she's so pure (for the lack of a better word) that she's able to not judge me for whom I was. Regardless, I find her presence soothing, and sometimes I just wish she's here all of the time, but then of course she hates my nature so if my wish were to come true, than she would probably find it in her best interest to stake me.

Of course, with that thought in mind I literally laughed my guts off. Sydney staking me is probably the last thing I have to worry about. Before being able to do that she has to get close to me first, and let's just say that girl has some bubble-sharing issues with vampires.

A beep on my computer reminded me that my intent was definitely not to sit here and daydream about a blonde haired, golden eyed beauty (did I just think that? I am slightly aghast), but to send her a complaint in which I feel is absolutely necessary. Placing my hand on top of the keyboard I began typing

_Day 24. Situation is growing worse. My captors continue to find new and horrific ways to torture me. When not working, Agent Scarlet spends her days examining fabric swatches for bridesmaid dresses and going on about how in love she is. That usually causes Agent Boring Borscht to regale us with stories of Russian weddings that are even more boring than his usual ones. My attempts at escape have been thwarted thus far. Also, I am out of cigarettes. Any assistance or tobacco products you can send will be greatly appreciated._

I looked at the letter and smiled, but I knew she wouldn't respond, and for the love of God, I need her to respond. I'm dying of boredom, and tobacco withdrawals. Suddenly a thought hit me and I immediately googled up Sparknotes. A devious smile crept across my face as I found what I needed, and sent out the email.

Rereading my masterpiece I find myself slightly upset, maybe this is Spirit kicking in. My mood swings have been getting worse these days. Sighing I threw my head backwards and glared at the ceiling. I'm oddly disoriented, when I think back at the email, and I slightly kick myself in the stomach (metaphorically) for being an idiot.

What if Sydney reads it, and analyzes the email because for all we know, she would. I don't want her finding out how I'm still slightly holding a grudge against Dimitri (though I'm sure she knows). When he talks about Russian weddings, or weddings in general I know that he's planning one with Rose. I can imagine her walking down the isle in a white dress with her friends and families smiling, clapping, and cheering.

Once upon a time ago, I was naive enough to think that maybe I could be that man. I thought that maybe after she killed Belikov she would give me a chance, a real chance, and then one day we could get married and have dhampir children (scratch that I don't really want children). Do I still want to be that man now? I'd be lying to say that I wouldn't, but lately I discovered something disturbing, one that I really should have noticed, but was so deep in denial to do so. Rose was never going to stay with me. Even if she killed Belikov and returned, she would have eventually left me.

I was not the one for her.

I was never the one for her.

And maybe that thought kills me a little inside, but I don't tell anyone, and I hope that Sydney doesn't detect my bitterness either. I promised myself that I would get over Rose, and I am. Slowly, but surely I will forget the way I felt when I touched her, when my lips molded with hers, and when she betrayed and cheated on me. Yes, one day I will forget the pain, and the pleasure of being her boy toy.

As I was about to turn off my desktop a notification informs me that I received a new email, looking at the sender I immediately smiled. Sydney.

_How do you know about 24601? I refuse to believe you read the book. You saw the musical right?_

I laughed. Her of all people should realize that I don't do musicals, and then I secretly smiled because she took the time to reply.

_Sparknotes_

I typed and sent. As expected there was no reply from her. Turning off the desktop I went over to my bed and laid down. Contrary to people's beliefs vampires do not sleep in coffins though sometimes I kind of do want to.

It was five in the morning when Jill called me announcing that Sydney is returning, and asking whether or not I would go pick her up. I yawned telling her that it's impossible because I have no car, and I'm pretty sure that Dimitri already went to pick her up.

When we hung up (after she happily tells me that Eddie was getting ready to go shop for Angeline's clothes) I got out of bed, got dressed, and walked to the living room. Sonya was sitting on the couch watching the television. She turned towards me and smiled, "You didn't go with Dimitri?" she asked.

"No, I don't see why I would either," I replied sitting next to her. Sometimes when I look at her, I feel scared. I fear that maybe one day I my resolve would be to turn Strigoi because Spirit is too much for me to handle. I wonder if Rose would come after me like she did for Dimitri.

Probably. Well probably if I went to attack either Dimitri or Lissa.

I wonder what my dad would do. He would probably say he was disappointed in me, and would most likely hire dhampirs to kill me. After all, he wouldn't risk ruining the Ivashkov image. Not that I didn't do a good job at it already.

Finally, I wonder who would care if I were gone. Of course Jill would, she's shadow kissed to me, but other then her who else. I know my mother would be glad I was gone she's serving prison time thanks to me. If I were never here in the first place would she have suffered that ordeal?

I want to say no.

Suddenly a thought hits me, would Sydney care of I was gone? Then I rolled my eyes. Why would it matter? But deep down, deep deep down it matters a lot. Sydney was my friend, and while she probably wouldn't admit it, I know she cares about me too.

"Is there something on my face?" Sonya asked suddenly. I blinked and turned away. "No. Sorry. I was just deep in thought," I replied.

"So Dimitri went to pick up Sage right?" I asked her. She nodded her head.

"Yeah, he left earlier this morning after dropping me off here. Dimitri says he'll return after he brings Sydney back onto the campus," she answered. I nodded my head, and was about to get up when suddenly she calls me, "Hey Adrian," she begun. I raised an eyebrow as I stare at her with a bemused expression.

"What?" I asked.

"About the project, thanks for cooperating. We really appreciate your effort," she said. I rolled my eyes.

"Considering that it's a decree from the queen, I don't think it's wise for me to refuse," I answered. Walking to the door I left the apartment complex to go to the smoking area. I really don't understand why people smoke. I don't even understand why I smoke. At first it was to rebel against my dad. To tell him that he can't control me, but then after he stops caring I didn't stop.

I choose to blame it on the nicotine.

After smoking I returned to my room and continued to work on a project, and by continue I simply mean sitting in front of the easel with a pencil in my hand. I have started this project for a while, but for some reason I never got to penning it down. Sighing I got a clothe and covered it, knowing that once again I won't be able to start on this particular project.

_That's the end of chapter two. I hope you guys enjoy it, and if you do (or have some suggestions) please leave me a review._


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

When afternoon came I heard a car stop and a cheerful laughing before I heard the doorbell ring. Actually I'm pretty sure I arrived to the door faster then the doorbell too. Opening the door I leaned against it and stared at both Eddie, and Sydney (mainly Sydney). A huge part of me is relieved that she's back. She's the distraction for me. She helps me think about other things unrelated to Rose, and a huge part of me needs that in order to stay sane. "The cavalry! Thank God." I exclaimed as Eddie walked in followed by Sydney who secretly smiled. I swear she should smile some more. It makes her golden eyes ever more bright, as bright as my living room.

As Sydney walks in I saw her eyeing the apartment as she always does. I can tell that she's still wary about this place, and I don't blame her. If I could stay somewhere else I would too, but since I do not have the luxury of choice, this is the best place I can get.

When she finally turned towards me I couldn't help but say, "Nice blouse, Sage, it really brings out the khaki in your pants," and really, it is a nice blouse.

I might have made that statement in a sarcastic tone, but I do appreciate the shirt hugging her curves. Though she's not as curvy as Rose, Sydney has softer and more delicate features. Features that I want to paint, like her eyes…they are a mesmerizing shade of molten gold.

"Glad you're back, Sydney," Sonya called out from the kitchen table, "I've needed a little female support here." I turned my body towards her, seeing her and Dimitri going through piles and piles of data. I wonder if they even know what it is they are looking at.

From the corner of my eyes I saw Dimitri raise his head up and smile at Sydney, "I'm guessing you didn't take a nap."

"Too much to do," she replied with a wry smile. She had a nice smile. Nicer than Rose's. She had a smile that can light up a room, an innocent smile, not flirty, and not demanding. When Rose smiles at me it's always because she needs something from me, like money for instance. At the time I was so used to that smile that I mistook it for affection, a sort of twisted affection, but affection nonetheless. Now the I met Sydney, I realize that out of the handful of times Rose smiled with me, it couldn't compare with one of Sydney's innocent, pure, and gorgeous smile.

It took me a while to realize that I was no longer paying any attention to their conversation, and the only parts I actually got was the end of Eddie's rant on how Angeline was easily distracted, and Belikov giving his usual spiel on responsibility. Eddie was eating up the whole thing. The kid practically grovels at Belikov's feet.

Bored of their talk I finally pulled up a chair, and turned it backwards as I gazed up to Sydney. With my chin resting on the back of it I asked her, "What about you, Sage? I know we don't have to worry about you violating the dress code. Did you have fun at your Alchemist spa this weekend?"

She placed her bag down besides the table and walked over to the fridge, I immediately knew what she was going to look for, "If by spa you mean underground bunker. And it was just business," she answered. Opening a fridge I saw her make a frustrated face, "You promised to get me diet pop," she pointed out. I knew it.

"I did promise that, but then I read some article that said those artificial sweeteners aren't good for you. So, I figured I'd watch out for your health. You're welcome," I replied with a remorseless expression, but truth is, I hated that she wanted to drink those unhealthy drinks. She's already skinny as it is. Given the choice, I would stuff her with a couple spoons of regular sugar just so she could gain some meat on her body.

Sydney turned and glared at me, and Dimitri said, "If you want to start tackling healthy habits, I could suggest a few."

"Wouldn't want to inconvenience you. Besides, when not hard at work with this research, I'm actually conducting a side experiment on how cigarettes and gin increase charisma. As you might guess, the results are looking very promising," I retorted. He arched an eyebrow, "Wait, go back. Did you say hard at work?"

And here is when it gets tricky. If Sydney or Eddie, or even Sonya had said that I would have rolled my eyes, or laughed along with them after saying some kind of joke. However, this is Belikov we're talking about, and he is someone I seriously dislike. After weighing my options (which included: retort back with something even more witty, or keep quiet) I decided to voice my thoughts on his opinions, that was until I noticed Sydney smiling at me towards my peripheral vision.

Yes, I know she's doing it as a distraction, but still it was a really cute smile, "Research, huh? I thought you were a gambling man." Turning towards her, I fixed my eyes on hers, "I've been known to roll the dice now and then. Why?" I asked her.

She shrugged her shoulders. "No reason. Just wondering if you'd put your charisma research on hold and step up for a challenge. If you went twenty-four hours without cigarettes, I'd drink a can of pop. _Regular_ pop. The whole can."

I couldn't help but smile at her decree, "You would not."

"I totally would."

"Half a can would put you into a coma."

From the table Sonya frowned, "Are you diabetic?" she asked. Sydney shook her head and I replied, "No, but Sage is convinced once extraneous calorie will make her go from super skinny to just regular skinny. Tragedy."

Sydney frowned and glared at me, "Hey, you think it'd be a tragedy to go an hour without a cigarette."

At her accusation I couldn't help but grin, "Don't question my steel resolve, Sage. I went without one for two hours today."

"Show me twenty-four, and then I'll be impressed."

I smirked and stuffed my hands into my pant pockets, "You mean you aren't already? And here I thought you were dazzled from the moment you met me."

Sydney stifled a laugh, while shaking her head. Of course she shakes her head, I'm a vampire, she probably thinks she hates my guts. From the kitchen stool Sonya stood up and walked over to the fridge, opening it, and grabbing a can of pop. "You're missing out, Sydney, I need about three of these a day to keep me focused on all this work. No detrimental effects so far," she remarked. From the corners of my eyes I saw Sydney eye Sonya up and down with envy.

I really hate it when she does that. She thinks that no one can tell, but I can. I see the way she looks at Sonya, and Jill, she wants their long and elegant body, but she can't have it. If I were braver, or if I was more of a friend to her then I would tell her. I would tell her that her wish, hope, or demented goal is forever unattainable. We are Moroi, and she is human. But I was scared, scared that she might get angry and leave the moment I opened my mouth and tell her how her fears are messed up, and her body is already perfect the way it is.

So instead of commenting on her look of envy, I blinked a couple of times and heard Dimitri suggesting us to get back to our work. "Right. This is five minutes of valuable research wasted," I said with a grim expression. One that I'm pretty sure everyone thought was due to Belikov pushing me around. Turning to Eddie I smiled warily, "Up for more fun, Castile? I know how much you love sitting around."

Eddie didn't say anything; instead he looked over to Sonya who began explaining to him what we were planning on doing today. For the most part, I zoned out on what Sonya was saying because I already heard it all yesterday, "I still say it's a waste, they're both dhampirs, but that doesn't mean we can assume any different reactions they have are because Belikov was a Strigoi. Everyone's unique. Everyone's going to respond differently to pictures of kittens or spiders," I explained. To their credit, most people kept quiet, but whether or not they were really listening to what I was saying, I couldn't tell. Then to make a point I added, "My old man? He hates kittens."

Eddie asked, "Who could hate kittens?"

I smiled, "He's allergic."

Sonya sighed, and shook her head, "Adrian, we've already been over this. I respect your opinion but still think we can learn a lot." Staring at her, I wanted to laugh. Respect my opinion? Yeah right, for the last month or so, they barely even cared about what I say. They go on an on about their research with no real evidence, or lead.

From where he was sitting Belikov stated, "All data is useful in this case. Especially since we haven't found anything so far. We know there's something different about former Strigoi. We can't rule out any chance to observe it," he reinforced. Simply speaking, I want to tear my hair out. Why can't these people listen to me for once? I'm trying to tell them they are doing something wrong, or at least they are focusing on the wrong leads, but instead I had a grim expression on my face, and turned away.

Finally we started to do the aura study, and for the most part I jotted down some notes, and told Sonya what I saw, and like I said their aura is mostly identical. How they react mirror each other, and there is nothing out of the ordinary. I had to resist the urge to say I told you so.

After a few more pictures, and nothing extraordinary Sonya asked Eddie to stay behind for another test. I was not looking forward to this. Eddie nodded his head and I inwardly groaned. From the corner of my eyes Sydney yawned, and I wanted to laugh. Maybe this would be their queue to call it a night.

But of course, Sydney, always the considerate female alchemist that she is replied, "No, no, I don't mind. What are your other ideas?"

Then of course, Sonya whipped out her oh-so-awesome plan about how we are now going to use sounds instead of pictures because they make a whole world of difference. Yawning I crouched over from where I was sitting, placing my elbows on my knees and my hands covering my face. I am so tired of these stupid tests. Call me uncooperative, but they are downright stupid.

Probably noticing my tired expression Sonya claims that maybe we should get food, Sydney volunteered to go, and I followed suite, but Sonya apparently thought otherwise. "The last time you ran an errand, you were gone two hours," she pointed out. I scowled at her, and slumped down in my seat. As they left I stared at them longingly. I really wanted to stretch my legs, and maybe smoke a couple of cigars, but apparently that was out of the question.

Sighing I turned back to the two men in front of me already in their respective chairs again. "Let's get to this then," I mumbled.

_I hope you guys enjoy reading the previous chapter. I contemplated whether or not to post this chapter tonight, but decided to as a congratulatory present for anyone who read my story and voted for Adrian at the YA Sisterhood Crush Tournament. If you didn't know, Adrian won, and if you voted then thank you._

**_Anyways I hope you enjoy this chapter, and please Review if you get a chance._**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

It was five in the morning when I got up because of a phone call. I really hated when Jill thinks that she can call me anytime, and I'll pick up because I have nothing better to do. Groaning I reached over to my cell phone. "What?"

"Hi Adrian!" she greeted in a chirpy tone. Seems like someone is happy. "Sorry for waking you up again, but you know I just want to call you," she said nervously. There is underlying message in her tone, but I don't point that out to her.

I sighed. Of course Jill would want to call me, to check up on me. I swear even though she's in my head (I don't know when, but I hope it's not at some inopportune time) she's still scared that I'm going crazy. I mean she would probably know that I'm heading towards insanity before I do. "I'm fine Jill, just grumpy, and tired, and hungry," I assure her. Truth be told, I am hungry, I haven't drank any blood for a day couple of days, and the heat is killing me.

"Oh, I just wanted to make sure you know. I'll be kind of lonely without you here," she whispers the ending.

"Look Jill, don't worry, if I feel like I'm going to go crazy I'll tell you. Or you'll feel it through the bond, most likely the latter because I'll be in denial the whole time," I told her and a silence fell through the phone. I wanted to hang up and go back to sleep, but I don't because I can feel something is bothering her. I might not have the advantage of the bond, but I still have a man's intuition.

"Is something else bothering you?" I finally ask her after about three minutes of absolute silence.

"Well, I…I was kind of in your head the other day," she began. I wanted to point out that she wasn't just "kind of" in my head, she was _literally_ in my head.

"What did you see?" I ask her.

"Um, well I heard you talking to your dad, and how he's coming to LA for work. I also heard you say you want to meet him," she says nervously. "I just wanted to know if he knows I'm here."

"Jill, trust me when I say this. I will die before I let him find you," I tell her in my most serious tone. She's like a little sister to me, in a way she is my cousin, just like Lissa, and I would protect her with everything I have.

After assuring her that the meeting doesn't matter, and I'm probably not going anyways because he'll end up canceling, I hung up the cell phone and tossed it besides me. Yes, my dad did call a week or so ago, but it was a courtesy call. There was nothing behind his voice that suggests he cares about my well-being. Closing my eyes I took another nap for ten minutes or so before I woke up and changed for college.

When I finally reached the bus station I sighed, maybe I should go meet the old man, I need a car, and the bus is just so tiring and annoying.

Sitting in my usual seat I pulled out my sketchbook and started on my homework assignment. I should have done it sooner, but my apartment was filled with people the entire weekend. Scratch that, it was filled with people I don't care for every day. I take that back, I care for two people who come to and from my house.

When the bus stopped at the next station I notice a few guys walking in. One of them was a guy, probably younger than me. He carried himself with pride, and I found an instant animosity towards him. In other words, he seems like an ass, and that means a lot coming from me.

The guy had tanned skin, black hair, sharp features, and a body built through a lot of hard work, and at the peak of his neck I see a tattoo, but can't make out the whole image. Turning my attention back to my assignment I started to sketch a picture of some everyday objects. Personally I find this assignment stupid, and redrawing other peoples' invention doesn't make me feel all that proud. I enjoy abstract art, not this stuff, but homework is homework. Though I could always use a little compulsion on the instructor to make her think I did it when I reality I didn't.

Of course in the end I wouldn't go through with it. I mean if word got around that the teacher is letting one of her students off the leash easily it might not go well, and the news might make it back to Sydney who would probably find the whole entire act repulsing.

Sighing I decided to sketch a series of items I usually find in my restroom. Obviously I didn't draw them exactly how they look. That would be no fun. Instead I sketched them in ways where people might not recognize them immediately. For instance on the toothbrush instead of having bristles I drew them with spikes, for my hair brush I drew snakes on them (get it like Medusa), and for the razor, well that one I drew it like a razor.

After twenty or so minutes the bus finally stopped in front of Carlton College, a place where I probably wouldn't find myself at two years ago, but then a lot has changed in two years. I fell in and out of love, and that changed my perspective on the world.

_Sorry this is pretty much a fluff chapter because nothing much happened in chapter four that could be written in Adrian's POV. Additionally sorry for the late update, I was working the whole day yesterday so I didn't have access to a computer._

_I hope you enjoy this chapter._


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

Part of me was just not thrilled at getting a text from Jill in the middle of class saying something important happened, and I had to call her immediately. Well I want to tell her tough luck because I'm busy, but I don't. Instead I left the class to return her call, she picked up on the first ring which makes me wonder whether or not she was in class at all, though it's four in the afternoon and I guess only college students have class late in the afternoon.

"Hey, what's the matter?" I said.

"Oh my god Adrian, I heard from Eddie, who heard from Kristin, who heard from Julia, who heard from Trey that Sydney has a date!" she squealed, and I think the first thing I did was laughed. This is Sydney Sage we're talking about, smart girl extraordinaire, control freak, and slightly oblivious to other people's approach, I highly doubt she does have a date. Whoever these people are, I conclude they are lying, so I told Jill, "I don't believe it."

I can feel her rolling her eyes on the other end, "Well you should, Trey was there when it happened," she explained.

"I still don't believe it. This is Sydney Sage, well Melrose right now, but still Sydney," I argued.

"I feel like you don't want to believe me, and you're feeling conflicted right now," she points out.

"I don't believe you not because I'm feeling conflicted, which I am not, but because Sydney values work ethics above socialization, she wouldn't risk dating if it blows our cover."

"Adrian I swear to you I'm not lying, the other people aren't lying, and Sydney does have a date," she said. There was desperation in her tone this time, but I still don't buy it. Instead I said goodbye to her and hung up the phone.

"No way Sage has a date, yeah that can never happen," I told myself as I returned to class. Turns out my guts didn't fully agree with my brain. For the rest of class I couldn't pay attention to it at all. I messed up mixing the pain colors, and instead of coloring the particular area black, I painted it hot pink. I mixed black in a bucket of yellow paint, and I spilt water all over the ground. The professor was thoroughly upset at me by the end of class, but a little magic resolves all the tension. Hopefully people don't find out.

When I got home, after the long dreary bus ride I threw my stuff onto my bed (much to Sonya and Dimitri's dismay) and threw myself on it. I pulled out my phone from my pockets and began to dial Sydney's number, but then hesitated. For some reason I don't know why I'm so upset, I mean I shouldn't be. Whether or not she dates doesn't matter to me. She's a friend, a good friend, and a worthy enemy. I have no doubt she can kill me by slipping me some funky chemicals.

Nevertheless, I find myself kind of, to be honest upset, but I have to calm myself down. After ten minutes of lying on my bed staring at the ceiling, and convincing myself that the only reason I'm going to call is because I want to confirm whether or not it's true, and if it is I will make fun of her to no end, I dialed the number.

When she picked up everything I doubted came out before she could say hello to me, "Really, Sage? A date?" Part of me hopes that she says "no" even if I lose the opportunity to make fun of her.

On the other line she sighs, "Yes, Adrian. A date." I gasp, hopefully she didn't hear me.

"A real date. Not, like, doing homework together. I mean where you go out to a movie or something. And a movie that's not part of a school assignment. Or about something boring." I realized that during my interrogation I covered all grounds of where this will not end up being a date, and mentally punched myself because I don't care what Sydney does.

"A real date," she said with confidence.

"What's the lucky guy's name?" I ask her. I don't tell her that I have a huge urge to drink his blood. She would think of me as a beast.

"Brayden," she told me. I paused as a series of thoughts went through my head. First of all, what is a Brayden. It has got to be one of the most boring names in the history of names. "Brayden? That's his real name?" I asked her.

"Why are you asking if everything's real? You think I'd make any of this up?"

I don't tell her part of me wanted it to be made up, instead I replied, "No, no, that's what's so unbelievable about it. Is he cute?"

She gave an exasperated sigh. "Gee, maybe I should just send you a picture to review?"

"Yes, please. And a full background check and life history," I told her, but I don't tell her what I want to use them for. Maybe blackmail, she is my sister, I don't want any guy to just use her.

"I have to go. Why do you care so much anyway?" she asked me. I paused not knowing what to say. I know what I want to say, or do I even know? Do I tell her that I don't want her to date? Or maybe I should tell her some lie about how it's in her nature to be responsible for everyone, and dating is something she used to frown down on?

When I finally responded to her question, I told her the truth, "Because it's one of those things I never expected to see in my lifetime. Like a comet. Or world peace. I'm just used to you being single." I know I sound like an ass, hell I make it sound like no one wants her, but it's the truth, and maybe that's why I've been so upset the entire day. I'm just used to the idea of her being single, and the thought that her dating someone is just too mind-blowingly weird.

"What, you don't think any guy would ever be interested in me?" she asked, and I frowned.

"Actually, I can imagine lots of guys being interested in you," I told her. What I didn't tell her was, "I didn't think you'd be interested in them."

Over the next couple of days I busied myself with my painting, discussing with Sonya and Dimitri about our experiment, and sending emails to Sydney that included the usual message about how I wished she'd come rescue me (which I wished she did), and of course unsolicited dating advices. The dating advices include things like: how guys would act around girls they like, and she should not under any circumstances let a guy take advantage of her because of her lack of socializing skills, how they should stick to public places where there are a lot of people, and how she should not force herself on a second date if she didn't like the guy.

I wonder if she picked up the fact that I sent her tips on how to stay in the friendship area.

_I hope you enjoyed this chapter. The last one lacked in Sydrian interactions because they didn't interact in the book, and I wanted this story to parallel the timeline in the Golden Lily so I don't want to leave out chapters._

_Anyways I hope you liked it, and if you did (or didn't) please review and suggest on how I can improve. Thanks for reading._


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

I didn't see her the day before her date, and I might as well not because I didn't feel sound of mind that day. I fear that Spirit is holding a tighter leash on me. I feel not here sometimes. Sometimes like the day of her date I get really scared. I don't know why. It happened once when I was with Rose.

On that day, much like a few days ago I was sitting in front of a easel and suddenly my head hurts, and I feel tired, but not all there. Like I was in my body, but at the same time I wasn't. It scared me, so it was a good thing no one was there to experience that with me.

The next time I did see her though, I was sitting in Clarence's living room waiting for my turn to drink blood. I don't tell anyone (though I suspect Jill might know) but blood calms down Spirit.

Anyways, I was sitting besides Sydney laughing at something Jill told me prior to our visit to Clarence. Apparently on her date with Brandon she ended it with a formal handshake. While I already knew what she did I still couldn't help asking, "You shook his hand?" She glared over at Angeline and Eddie accusingly. Good thing for Jill she was out drinking blood because if looks can kill I'm pretty sure she would be dead.

"No," said Angeline bluntly, and Eddie laughed.

"Was it supposed to be a secret?" Eddie asked her.

She sighed and admitted that it wasn't; after all, if it was then she wouldn't go around telling people the information knowing that half of Palm Springs was somehow "related" to her. Anyways I continued looking at her with an amused expression, "Really? His hand?"

Sinking back into her seat she let out another sigh. "Look, it just happened-okay, you know what? Never mind. This is none of your business. Just let it go." I glared at her. I don't know how she thinks I can let go of this precious moment I can use to make fun of her for the rest of her life, but a part of me was glad that she or he didn't jump on her. If he did, I don't know if I could spare him his life. Draining blood isn't the only way to kill.

"With all that red-hot passion, it's a wonder you guys can stay away from each other. Is there going to be a second date?" I ask her. Part of me wishes she would say no. I mean why would she go out on another date with a guy who she obviously has no connection with. And no, connecting hands don't count as connection.

When I looked back at her, I found her hesitating. "Yes," she finally told us with a wary smile. "We're going on a, um, windmill tour later this."

I don't know whether or not I should be shock at this revelation. Earlier this week I discovered that Sydney went to see a rendition of a Shakespeare play with this guy, and now they are going to a windmill. Color me surprised. "I'm going to assume that means he's flying you to Amsterdam on his private jet. If so, I'd like to come along. But not for the windmills."

"There's a huge windmill farm north of Palm Springs. It's one of the only ones in the world that does public tours," she explains, and once again we were shocked silence. How some guy can spend time with this gorgeous girl in a windmill I have no idea. Maybe it's a good thing though; if he's such a ditz he won't have the initiative to do anything to her.

When none of us spoke she yelled, "Wind energy is a powerful renewable resource that could have a huge impact on our country's future. This is a cool thing."

I laughed, "Cool. Wind. I see what you did there, Sage. Pretty clever."

"It wasn't meant to be a—" she started, but got cut off when she saw Sonya enter the room along with Clarence. I swear my experience living with him a couple of months ago scarred me for eternity. No alcohol, no cigarettes, and crazy talk about vampire hunters. God, it was horrible, and the old man was loony. Sure he was nice, but also crazy, and there is already enough crazy in the city of Palm Springs.

"Hello, Mr. Donahue. It's nice to see you again," Sydney says to him. As they began their casual conversation I leaned against the couch and contemplated whether or not I should ask Sydney to take me to San Diego to see my dad. Understandably, I did tell Jill that I probably wouldn't be going, but I do need more money, and I want to know about my mom.

I've written countless letters, left countless emails, and called him countless times to request for some sort of news about my mother, but to no avail. He never replies, and when he does it's something generic like, "She's fine." Of course, every single time he tells me that I argue that I'm not an idiot I mean she's in prison. How fine can someone be in prison?

When I finally rejoined their conversation, I was in the middle of hearing Clarence speak about his infamous vampire hunters, and Dimitri saying that he was not qualified to install a security system. "Really? There's something you can't do?" I mutter silently. Yes, I know it's petty, but I am still holding a grudge on him. Besides he probably didn't even hear me, although Sydney did because she turned to look at me with a questioning glance.

The conversation continued on with Clarence being paranoid, and Dimitri telling him that he would do frequent security checks. It was the same usual boring shit I didn't really care about. However, something interesting did happen. It occurred when Sonya gently lull Clarence into a state of serenity through compulsion. Besides me Sydney squirmed. I hated when she squirms at us for using our magic, she should know by now that it's a part of us. Telling us to suppress it is like telling us to stop breathing.

Finally when everything calmed down Sonya informed us that she wouldn't be along much longer. "I need to go back and work on some wedding plans with Mikhail."

"When is the big day again?" I asked her because simply I can't remember.

"It's in December," she smiled. "There's a huge, tropical greenhouse near the Court that we're going to use. It's gorgeous—not that it matters. Mikhail and I could be married anywhere. All that counts is that we're together. Of course, if we're able to choose, then why not go all out."

When I glanced at Sydney I saw her smile. I guess all girls enjoy wedding talks. "Dimitri may stay on," she continued. "But it'd be great if we could make some kind of progress before I go. The aura tests so far have been…"she trailed off, and here is the part where I want to say, "I told you so," except of course I don't.

Instead I suggested, "Useless?"

"I was going to say inconclusive," she replied.

I shook my head exasperatingly, "So all that time we spent was wasted?" Sonya didn't answer me, and I know I got her. All this time I've been saying that aura tests are useless, and no one listens to me. Now that they finally agree they won't even tell me a simple apology. I don't see how hard it is for them to admit that they are wrong.

Sonya leaned forward on the table and eagerly said, "Dimitri and I were talking and realized there's something obvious we've been missing. Actually, I should say avoiding, but not pursuing it would be a waste."

"What's that?" I asked her, though I already know her answer.

"Blood," Dimitri answered, and I saw Sydney winced. I fought the urge to put my arm over her shoulders. "Obviously, there's something about restored Strigoi that protects them—use. We've looked for magical signs, but the answer might be more physical. And from the report I read, the Strigoi had trouble drinking L—his blood."

I leaned against the couch as the conversation continued on about the blood experiments. Honestly, I could care less about their experiments, but at least this time I feel like they are heading towards the right direction. During the entire conversation I kept to myself, except for of course one time where Angeline claimed that Sydney could stop coming along with Eddie for the experiments. I found the urge to slap some senses into her. I don't care how big of a crush she has on Eddie, but I live for the time Sydney comes over to my house. I would die with just Captain Serious, Happy McNewBride, and me.

Finally Jill entered the room the conversion came to a close, "Your turn Adrian," she called over to me and I yawned. Standing up I glanced over at Sydney, "Will you walk with me a sec, Sage? Don't worry, I'm not taking you to the feeding. I just want to ask you a quick question."

Nodding her head she got up and followed me, and as soon as we were away from the others she immediately said, "I do _not_ want to hear any more 'witty' commentary on Brayden."

I laughed, "My commentary's hilarious, not witty. But that's not what I wanted to talk about. So, it seems my old man's coming to San Diego on business next weekend." We stopped besides the feeder's room. I promised her I wouldn't take her inside. She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms across her chest.

"He doesn't know why I'm here, of course, or that I'm with Jill. He doesn't even know what city I'm in. He just thinks I'm partying in California, up to no good as usual." Though I tried to keep myself sounding neutral I think she still caught a hint of bitterness in my tone. "Anyway," I continued, "he said he'd meet me for lunch if I wanted. Normally, I'd blow it off…but I'd kind of like to know what's going on with my mom—they never tell me when I call or e-mail." I think I whispered the last part.

"Let me guess, you want to borrow my car?" she asks me, and I had to resist the urge to not laugh. I know her better than to ask her borrow her car besides I didn't want it. I wanted something else. Company per say. If my dad did tell me what happened to my mom, I don't want to be the only one sitting there worrying, I wanted someone next to me so I can talk. Talk and forget about the entire thing, or at least until I find my way to some booze.

"No way, I know better than that."

She looked surprised, "Then what do you want?"

I grinned, "I was hoping you'd drive me."

She groaned. "Adrian, it takes two hours to get there."

"It's pretty much a straight shot down the highway. And I figured you'd drive a four-hour round trip before giving up your car to someone else," I reasoned with her.

"That's true," she said eyeing me.

Sighing I took a step closer to her (mesmerized by her golden eyes). "Please, Sage. I know it's a lot to ask, so I'm not going to pretend you'd benefit. I mean, you can spend the day in San Diego doing whatever you want. It's not the same as going to see solar panels or whatever with Brady, but I'd owe you—literally and figuratively. I'll pay you gas money." Nevertheless, after saying that I realized that there isn't really a way for me to pay her gas money because I'm broke, but still I'd find a way to make it work.

"It's Brayden, and where in the world would you get gas money?" she asked me.

I hesitated for a moment. Honestly I really needed to know about my mom, and yes I know previously I had a lot more ambition going to see my dad, like more money perhaps, but when it gets down to it I really just want to know about my mom. "I…I'd cut back on things to come up with the extra money," I told her.

She looked at me surprised, "Really? You'd give up drinking to go see your dad?"

"Well, not permanently," he said. "That'd be ridiculous. But maybe I could switch to something slightly cheaper for a while." I don't tell her the fact that I could get free alcohol for all I wanted. Compulsion goes a long way, but I know she would frown at it. So instead I told her, "Like…slushes. Do you know how much I love those? Cherry, especially."

"Um, no. They're pure sugar."

"Pure deliciousness, you mean. I haven't had a good one in ages," I told her.

"You're getting off topic," she pointed out.

"Oh. Right. Well, whether I have to go on a slush-based diet or whatever, you'll get your money. And that's the other reason…I'm kind of hoping the old man might agree to up my income. You probably don't believe it, but I _hate_ always borrowing from you. It's easy for my dad to dodge phone calls, but face-to-face? He can't escape. Plus, he thinks it's more 'manly' and 'respectable' to ask for something directly. Classic Nathan Ivashkov honor," I finished. To be serious I was quite bitter about the last part.

"Is that really what this is about? The money?" she asked me. "You don't like him. There has to be something more here."

I looked down onto the ground quickly, and looked back up to her eyes. I know I shouldn't be saying this at this moment, but I suddenly have a newfound love for gold. Actually I loved it the moment I met her in Clarence's living room. Oh right, conversation. "The money's a big part. But I meant what I said earlier…about my mom. I need to know how she is, and he won't tell me about her. Honestly, I think he just wants to pretend it never happened—either for that reputation of his or maybe…maybe because it hurts him. I don't know, but like I said, he can't dodge if I'm right there."

She eyed me questioningly, urging me to go on and I immediately looked away from her when I found the courage to look back up I whispered, "Plus…I don't know. It's stupid. But I thought…well maybe he'd be impressed that I was sticking to college this time. Probably not, though."

Sydney looked at me with a sympathetic expression and I looked away. I don't have to tell her that what I really wanted was my dad's approval, and forgiveness. I tore apart our family, and maybe I wanted to do something to tell him I was sorry. Like trying out school for real this time.

"Why me?" she suddenly asked. "You could've asked Sonya or Dimitri to drive you. They probably would've even let you borrow their rental car."

A faint smile crossed my face, "I don't know about that. And I think you know why I don't want to risk being trapped in a car with our Russian friend. As for the rest…I don't know Sage. There's something about you…you don't judge like others," like Rose, but I don't say that of course, "I mean, you do. You're more judgmental than any of them in some ways. But there's an honesty to it." I trailed off as I stared at her. This was the moment I get to say something I always kept in my heart because I know she finds me utterly disgusting, but if I were to ever say it, this would be the perfect moment. Mustering up my courage I finished my last thought. "I feel…comfortable around you, I guess." However, in reality I don't guess because I do feel comfortable around her.

Looking at her face I saw the look of contemplation, and I know she's going to say no. She wouldn't want to spend an entire day with a vampire, even if he promised to not hurt her. "Okay. I'll do it. E-mail me what time you need to leave," she told me.

I was shocked, and at a lost for words. "Really?" I asked her.

She laughed, "You gave me that whole pitch and didn't really think I'd agree, did you?"

"No," I admitted to her, still amazed. "I can't always tell with you. I cheat with people, you know. I mean, I'm good at reading faces, but I picked up a lot from auras and act like I just have amazing insight. I haven't learned to totally understand humans, though. You've got the same color but different feel."

"What color is mine?" she asked genuinely curious.

"Yellow, of course."

"Of course?"

"Smart, analytic types usually have yellow. You've got a little purple here and there, though. That's what makes you interesting."

"What's purple mean?"

I laughed and put my hand on the door. "Gotta go, Sage. Don't want to keep Dorothy waiting." Of course I don't tell her what it means because if I keep her curious enough she would stay around longer.

"Come on. Tell me what purple is," she begged, and for a second I thought she was going to grab my arm. Honestly I kind of want her to.

Instead I told her, "I will if you want to join us."

"Adrian—" she starts, but before she finished I was already on the other side of the room. I don't want to stand there and hear her talk us down. It makes me feel weird. Yes, I know she hates vampires, but that doesn't mean I have to agree with what she says.

Sitting on the chair I grabbed Dorothy and sunk my fangs into her veins. As the blood from her body flowed into mine I felt slightly stronger, but very disgusted with myself. Before meeting Sydney Sage I never felt disgusted or disappointed with being a vampire. Now I'm not so sure anymore.

When I left the room, I saw Sydney heading back and I followed her to the couch and sat besides her. Sonya and Dimitri was there still discussing on the possibilities of their new experiment. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, that was until they started asking for the impossible. They asked Sydney for her blood.

During the beginning of the argument Sydney was handling herself very well so I didn't feel the urge to interrupt her. However, Sonya and Belikov just don't seem to get it, and I felt Sydney tense besides me. Finally letting out a loud sigh I informed them, "She said no, okay? How many times does she have to refuse? If she doesn't want to then that's all there is to it. This has nothing to do with her. This is our science project. She's here to protect Jill and has plenty to do there. So stop harassing her already," I yelled out.

"'Harassing' is kind of a strong word," Dimitri said.

"Not when you keep pushing someone who wants to be left alone. Stop ganging up on her," I tell her seriously. I notice that Sonya was glancing at the both of us warily.

"Adrian…Sydney…we aren't trying to upset anyone. We just really wanted to get to the bottom of this. I thought all of you did too. Sydney's always been so supportive," Sonya explained.

I growled at her. "It doesn't matter. Take Eddie's blood. Take Belikov's blood. Take your own for all I care. But if she doesn't want to give hers, then that's all there is to it. She said no. This conversation is done," I finished leaving the shocked expression on everyone's face.

"But…" Sonya started.

"Let it go," Dimitri said to her.

Besides me I feel Sydney gazing up and smiled at me.

_I hope you enjoy this chapter._

_ Pixie, as per request I will do two chapters simultaneously, but it won't be this chapter. It will be chapter 7 and 8. Thanks for your time, I don't you enjoy my story. If you get a chance please review my chapter._

_-Christina_


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

When Sydney left the house my gaze never left hers, just like how Dimitri's didn't stop staring at me. "What is it?" I asked him when I found myself annoyed. I returned back to where I was sitting across from Dimitri and crossed my arms across my chest. He continued to stare at me. "I know I'm gorgeous, but staring at me won't help me fall in love with you," I retorted. He finally rolled his eyes.

"You know you seem different. I can't place it, but it's a good difference. It's nice seeing you not drunk and depress for once," he pointed out.

"No thanks to you, and your girlfriend," I muttered knowing that he'll hear me. He's a dhampir, like us, he has super hearing. It was around nine when I got home, Sonya drove me home because she proclaimed that Dimitri and I in the same care would result in something being accidentally blown up. I didn't argue because I don't want to spend any more time with him then necessary. While I agree that he's good at his job, I still don't want him anywhere close to me.

When I finally got home I was sitting in my bedroom with a paintbrush in my mouth, and a paint palette in my left hand. For some people yoga is their time for peace and inner connection. For me it's painting and alcohol. Obviously though unless I drink myself numb I won't be able to prevent Jill from feeling the effects of being drunk, so I don't do that anymore.

Finally deciding that I'll paint that particular section yellow, I dipped brush in my palette, and swirled the brush in a bright golden yellow. Lifting up the tool, I dabbed it over the section in small, yet articulate strokes.

When I got to my fifth or something stroke I received a call. Obviously from Jill, I really hate these random phone calls in the middle of the night.

"Hello," I answered in a less than happy tone.

"Hi Adrian," she chirped. God I wonder how she's always so happy. I need to learn how she self medicates herself in this sun. "So, what are you painting?" she suddenly asked me, "It looks like someone," she adds teasingly.

"I am not painting, wait were you in my head?" I asked her annoyed. I hate Spirit Bonds, and I hate the fact that I can't control what she sees or hears. On the other end of the line she giggles. "Yeah, oh and you know, I found what you did for Sydney earlier today really brave," she said.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I answered her.

"Don't even lie. I know it when you do. Anyways, I felt how you felt during the whole conversation. Need I remind you the urge you felt to protect her," she pointed out. I should argue that I didn't feel like protecting Sydney, that the only reason why I did it was because I hate Belikov's guts, but that isn't why. I really did want to protect her, but a part of me hoped that she wanted to give blood too.

A part of me wanted her to maybe indulge in a little vampire fantasy for a little bit. "You're feeling longing," Jill said from the other line. "I'm not," I retort.

"I feel it," she answered.

"You're feeling wrong."

"God Adrian, how many times do I have to tell you that the bond doesn't lie?" she asked me.

"The bond is a liar. I am feeling nothing, and I'm not painting anything either," I argued while putting all my stuff away. "Anyways why did you call me? Did you need something?"

"I felt that it was necessary to call you, you were feeling all over the place, and I was feeling confused," she muttered, and I sighed.

"I'm fine Jill, Spirit is not taking over my body," I assured her. There was silent on the other end, and when she finally spoke she said something I didn't want to hear at all. "It's not that Adrian," she begins, "you told me I'll be able to feel the Spirit when it takes over your body, but this isn't it. It feels different somehow. You feel healed, well a little bit healed anyways," she informed me.

I have to hand it to this kid. She is smart. I do feel healed, not all the way. The heartbreak with Rose still eats my heart, but I think everything is going to be okay, or as okay as slowly going crazy is anyways.

"Oh yeah, I also wanted to apologize about something too," she said in an ashamed tone.

"About what?" I asked her.

"Well you see earlier today when you were talking with Sydney, I heard it all, and I felt it all too. The conversation was so personal, and I feel like a bad guy for watching it. I'm sorry Adrian," she whispered. I sighed knowingly. Of course she would see that. She saw every intense emotion I ever felt since the bond.

"It's fine Jill. Hey while this talk is invigorating and all, but I'm very tired. I'll see you later," I told her. She nodded her head (at least I'm pretty sure she did) and hung up the phone.

Over the next couple of days I continued to send Sydney some tips on dating, but mostly they consists of my views on windmills, and the only thing I would enjoy doing there. Of course, on the day of her date I found myself looking up information on windmills, I mean it can only be so exciting seeing a bunch of metal fans spinning in the air.

Even after researching it, I still don't get it. The only assurance I got that the date between Sydney and Brad went okay was when Jill called me and said that Sydney came back to the dorm dazed. I can only imagine why, and in my imagination Brendan always end up dead.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

It was the night before I met up with Sydney to go to San Diego, and I'm choosing something to wear from my outfit. Since I'll be asking for some money it would be best to not look so clear-cut. Nevertheless, everything in my entire closet reflected rich party boy. Nothing looked like something a poor college student would wear. Finally deciding on a button up shirt and jeans I wrinkled it up into a ball and tied it tightly with a piece of string, and finally tossing it into the washer, and then the dryer.

Letting the dryer run I went to sleep mentally exhausted. The meeting hasn't happened yet and I am already tired.

I woke up the next day hearing Sonya say that she is going out on an errand. I asked her to drop me off in front of Sydney's dorm. Sonya frowned at that saying something about it being scandalous, but I pointed out that I'm her brother. She rolled her eyes, but agreed anyways.

When I reached the dorm, I found out through the dorm mother that Sydney was out, and that if I wanted to see her I would have to wait. I don't like waiting; nevertheless, I guess I was at fault for not allowing her to come pick me up. It took another ten or so minutes before a car pulled up. I saw a guy who was probably Brayden sit. I can't believe I suddenly remembered his name. This guy pissed me off and I haven't even met him, but I have to admit this is part of the reason why I wanted to go early. I wanted to meet the guy that made Sydney Sage squeal in excitement. Well she never squealed, but still.

I jumped up from where I was sitting when I saw her walk out of the car with that guy. "Wasn't I supposed to pick you up?" she asked me somewhat irritated.

"Sonya had some errands to run and offered to drop me her while she was out," I explained. I think that it's a moot point to tell her that I had to ask Sonya to take me here because she thought it was scandalous. "Figured we'd save you some trouble," I added in the end. She rolled her eyes obviously understanding that my motives weren't so pure.

Looking over to that guy, she introduced, "This is Brayden. Brayden, Adrian." He held out his hands.

Taking it I smirked. "I've heard so much about you," I told him.

He frowned. "I've actually never heard of you. I didn't even know Sydney had another brother," he answered.

I glared over at Sydney hiding the fact that I'm kind of sad she never even bothered mentioning me. But of course, why should she?

"It never came up," she said.

Looking back at Brayden I asked, "You're still in high school, right?" He arched an eyebrow not understanding what I'm trying to say. I nodded toward the car, "You must have a side job to make those car payments, though. Unless you're one of those slackers who just tries to get money off their parents." I silently laughed at the irony behind that statement. Here I am, somewhat accusing a high school student of being a lazy bum when reality the real person is lazy is standing directly in front of him.

Looking indignant and proud he answered, "Of course not. I work almost every day at a coffee shop."

"A coffee shop, I see," I repeated. "I suppose it could be worse." Actually to be fair I think this guy is pretty talented. He is juggling apparently full time, or so he claims, and still manages to become a genius. I guess I see what Sydney sees in him. However, I don't tell him I'm impressed because sometimes my sarcasm just gets the better of me.

"Adrian—" Sydney began. I can tell from the tone of her voice, she doesn't find me as amusing as I find myself.

"Well, it's not like I'm going to work there forever, I've already been accepted to USC, Stanford, and Dartmouth," he argued. I nodded my head. Part of me is very impressed, and the other part of me feels like he is bragging and can see right through my façade. I'm in essence everything he isn't. I have no job, and no money. I wasn't accepted into some prestige college, and even if I were to be accepted it would be through a back door connection.

Finally I said, "I guess that's respectable. Although, I've always thought Darmouth as the kind of school people go to when they can't get into Yale or Harv—"

"We really need to go," Sydney said interrupting my speech. She grabbed hold onto my arm and pulled me towards the parking lot. "We don't want to get caught in traffic," she explained to Brayden who glanced at his cell phone.

"Traffic patterns should be relatively light going west this time of the day, but being weekend, you never know how tourists might alter things, especially with the various attractions in San Diego. If you look at the traffic models applying the Chaos Theory—" I began and I was five seconds, literally, from telling him to shut up because no one cares about the Chaos Theory, or even know what the heck that is. Instead I don't because Sydney exclaimed, "Exactly. Better safe than sorry. I'll text you when I get back, okay? We'll figure out the rest of this week."

I rolled my eyes as she dragged me away. Once we were in the car Sydney glared at me. "Really? You couldn't have just said 'nice to meet you,' and let it go?"

"Just looking out for you sis. Don't want you ending up with some deadbeat," I started after pushing back the seat and lounging onto the passenger seat. "Believe me, I'm an expert on that kind of thing," I said with smirk. But secretly I'm scowling. I only know because I'm one of them.

"Well, I appreciate your insider knowledge, but I'll manage this on my own, thanks just the same."

"Come on, a barista? Why not some business intern?" I asked her.

"I like that he's a barista. He always smells like coffee," she points out and I rolled my eyes towards the window I was slowly opening.

"I'm surprised you let him drive you around, especially considering the way you freak out if anyone touches the controls in your car," I told her.

"Like the window? When the air conditioning's on?" she asked me. I rolled my eyes, but smirked because this is the reaction that I wanted from her. I can't help it sometimes I just want to rile her up. I know she has more attitude than she's letting on. "He wants to drive. So I let him. Besides, I like that car."

"That is a nice car," I admitted. "Though I never took you for the type to go for status symbols," I teased her. Though I don't think she got the memo.

"I don't. I like it because it's an interesting car with a long history."

"Translation: status symbol."

Keeping her eyes on the road she sighed, "Adrian. This is going to be a long ride."

Despite the discussion on Brayden during the beginning of our trip we spent most of it talking about random topics. I tried to maintain my carefree attitude throughout the whole thing talking about my art classes, and how much I enjoyed them. Obviously I didn't tell her how I might have used a bit of compulsion on the teacher, but that is besides the point.

Midway during our trip we stopped by a coffee shop, and Sydney bought me a cup of coffee. I really hated having other people spend money on me, especially Sydney because it makes me feel useless. It's times like this that I want to strangle Rose and force her to return the money I gave her, but I don't because it's dirty money, and I would rather live in the streets with no food, water, or clothes then take back the money I gave her.

During the last stretch of our journey I sat in absolute silence dreading the conversation with my dad. For one I don't know which part of my speech I'm going to begin with, and secondly I Sydney's yellow aura is distracting me. I know that I should be used to it by now, but I'm not. Her aura is so yellow it's amazing. It's like watching the sun. But of course I have to resist the urge to stare at her because she'll probably think I want to drink her blood.

For all I know she's probably scared out of her guts right now so when she opened her mouth I never imagined her asking me the question that she did. "Have you guys learned anything from Eddie and Dimitri's blood?"

I glanced at her surprised, "Didn't expect you to bring that up."

"Hey, I'm curious about the science of it. I just didn't want to participate."

Of course she was interested in the science, it makes me wonder if I'm part her science experiment would she touch me. Obviously she wouldn't, she'll have other people touch me and she'll get the results later. Finally I answered, "Not much to tell so soon. They sent the samples off to a lab—one of your labs, I think—to see if there's anything physically different between the two. Sonya and I did pick up a…oh, I don't know how to describe it. Like, a 'hum' of spirit in Belikov's blood. Not that him having magic blood should surprise anyone. Most people seem to think everything he does is magic."

Sydney looked over at me for a second before a returning her gaze on the road, "Oh, come on. That's unfair."

"Is it? You've seen the way Castile worships him. He wants to be just like Belikov when he grows up. And even though Sonya's usually the spokesperson for our research, she won't breathe without checking with him beforehand. 'What do you think, Dimitri?' 'Is this a good idea, Dimitri?'" I was about done, then I added the last part just for laugh, "'Please give us your blessing so that we can fall down and worship you, Dimitri."

Besides me Sydney shook her head, "Again—unfair. They're research partners. Of course she's going to consult him."

"She consults him more than me," I pointed out, but from the look on her face she seemed skeptical. I can tell, she thinks I'm being unfair, but that's not it. It's not only because I don't want to join them, but it's because I feel that even if I do they won't appreciate my input. They'll shrug it off as an, 'It's Adrian,' thing and ignore me. People do that a lot.

"They've both been Strigoi. They've kind of got a unique insight to this," she retorts.

For several moments I sat and stared out the window. "Okay. I'll give you points for that. But you can't argue that there was any competition between me and him when it came to Rose. You saw them together. I never had a chance. I can't compare." Shit. I didn't want to talk about this. I was going to bury this forever, and here I told Jill that I'm slowly getting healed. Well whatever progress I had was definitely ruined.

"Well why do you have to?" she asked me.

Sighing I stared at her side profile and decided that I might as well get this over with. Hell knows that I've been wanting to talk to someone about my feelings, but had no one to talk to it about. "Because I wanted her," I answered Sydney simply. Because I freaken loved her and she ripped my heart out and cheated with Belikov. How could she do that to me without thinking about my feelings.

Oh wait. I do know how. She thinks that because I'm Adrian Ivashkov I'll be fine about everything, and that I'll just drink and smoke through depression.

"Do you still want her?" Sydney finally asks me. I didn't answer her because I don't know. Part of me still wants her, but the other part doesn't because I hate her for using me. "Look, you and Dimitri are two different people. You shouldn't compare yourself to him. You shouldn't try to be like him. I mean, I'm not going to sit here and rip him apart or anything. I like Dimitri. He's smart and dedicated, insanely brave and ferocious. Good in a fight. And he's just a nice guy."

I scoffed, "You left out dreamy and ruggedly handsome."

"Hey, you're pretty easy on the eyes too. And don't underestimate yourself. You're smart too, and you can talk yourself out of—and into—anything. You don't even need magical charisma," I think she forgot the part where I have compulsion, so it's impossible for me to be stuck at whatever position.

"So far I'm not seeing a lot of difference between me and a carnival con-man."

She laughed, and I think that we finally got out of the danger zone. "Oh stop. You know what I mean. And you're also one of the most fiercely loyal people I know—and caring, no matter how much you pretend otherwise. I see the way you look after Jill. Not many people would've traveled across the country to help her. And almost no one would have done what you did to save her life."

I guess we weren't out of the danger zone yet, "But what are loyal and caring really worth?" I asked her. I didn't explain the fact that although I was definitely loyal and caring to Rose she didn't care.

"To me? Everything." She answered immediately and I turned to stare at her.

For the remainder of the ride I would look at her when she's not paying attention to me. Sydney just said something very important to me. No one ever said that my trust and loyalty meant everything to them. They usually scoffed at me for having those traits. My old man definitely thought those traits brought in shame for the family, and I did too, but Sydney, Sydney Sage full time alchemist, and part time my sister just said she appreciated me.

For some reason it made me feel happy, so happy and contented that I just sat there staring at her aura burning bright as the sunlight.

When we finally reached the hotel where my dad was staying I went with Sydney up a few levels up. "Take a closer look white I call the old man," I told her. She nodded her head. When I returned I stood right besides Sydney watching her fascination. She looked so young like that this. Her serenity ended when a mother called out to her daughter who was also named Sydney. Turning to face the women she met my eyes, and stepped back a little.

"How about some warning next time?"

"I didn't want to interrupt. You looked happy for a change," I explained.

"For a change? I'm happy lots of times."

"Does that guy—that Brendan guy—"

"Brayden," she corrected. I rolled my eyes because I obviously knew.

"Does that Brayden guy make you happy?" I asked her and she looked up to me surprised. I gave a blank neutral look.

"I guess. Yeah. I mean, he doesn't make me unhappy," I wanted to laugh. That doesn't mean you're happy, but I don't tell her. Instead I asked her, "Red-hot answer if ever there was one. What do you like about him? Aside from the car? And that he smells like coffee?"

"I like that he's smart, I like that I don't have to dumb myself down around him."

I frowned and stared at her, "You do that a lot for people?"

She gave a bitter laugh. "A lot? Try all the time. Probably the most important thing I've learned at Amberwood is that people don't like to know how much you know. With Brayden, there's no censoring for either of us. I mean just look at this morning. One minute we were talking Halloween costumes, the next we were discussing the ancient Athenian origins of democracy."

I arched an eyebrow. "I'm not going to claim to be a genius, but how the hell did you make that leap?"

"Oh, our Halloween costumes. We're dressing Greek. From the Athenian era."

"Of course," I began and smirked, "no sexy cat costumes for you. Only the most dignified, feminist attire will do." I don't tell her that obviously I won't mind seeing her dressed in a sexy cat costume.

"Feminist? Oh, no. Not Athenian women. They're about as far from feminist as you can—well, forget it. It's not really important," she said while shrugging her shoulders. I did a double take and eyed her weirdly.

"That's it, isn't it?" I asked leaning towards her (god the urge to stroke her face was so strong! And her eyes, they are amazing…).

"What?" she asked clearly flustered.

"You stopped yourself just now. You just dumped it down for me."

"Yeah, I kind of did." She admitted.

"Why?"

"Because you really don't want to hear about ancient Athens, any more than you wanted to hear Brayden talk about Chaos Theory," she said pointedly. I didn't point out to her that Brayden could be talking about the greatest bottle of alcohol in the world and I still wouldn't pay attention to him.

"That's different. He's boring. You make learning fun. Like a children's book or after school special. Tell me about your…um, Athenian women." I said to her.

I can tell that she resisted the urge to not smile. "Most Athenian women weren't educated. They mostly stayed inside and were just expected to have kids and take care of the house. The most progressive women were the hetaerae. They were like entertainers and high-class prostitutes. They were educated and a little flashier. Powerful men kept their wives at home to raise children and then hung out with hetaerae for fun," she paused and stared at my face, "Like I said, it's not really important."

I laughed at her uncertainty. She probably didn't realize that I did indeed listen to every single word she said. "I don't know, I find prostitutes vastly important."

"Well. How refreshing to see that things haven't changed," said a new voice, one I knew belonged to my old man. I flinched.

_As promised two chapters. Sorry for the later update then usual, I was working and didn't have time to write. Anyways I hope you enjoy the two chapters I posted, and please review. If there are any errors please tell me, I finished this at 3AM._


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